Day 3: here it is…

Day 3: 27 April 2018

Introduction: Thanksgiving, Praise and Worship exercise – exact words do not matter…

SONG: Big Daddy Weave – “Redeemed” (Official Music Video)

“Haunted by a ghost living in my past. Bound up in shackles of all my failures. Wondering how long this is going to last.”  

How can one human make so many life blunders? How can I have all of those ghosts piling up so high that I spent decades suffocating without air or light? Those days are finally behind me and a “hope that will carry me home.”

“Stop fighting a fight that has already been won.”

That is exactly when the fight inside of me stopped fighting, when I finally believed with everything in me that the fight had already been won.

We can become Christians with the understanding it is a gift, the ultimate eternal gift of salvation. Yet, while we live out our daily lives somehow that concept can get lost in noise. It also can get lost in our own nutty thinking and our emotions that get in the way of seeing you Lord for who you are. I know I have dearly loved you Lord, I have sought you out, begged, pleaded, studied your word to know you, yet I still have been trying to fight some of this battle called life on my own.

You have “broken” me before and I have grown through those experiences. This time it is different. That fight was also stripped from me during this last 6 years. You have allowed more to be taken from me so that the fight in me can be removed from my being. Thank you, Lord. Bless me with a heart to never have that fight in me again.

“I am not who I used to be, I am REDEEMED.”

I can still act like a two-year-old brat. I can still be hurt over things that do not really matter. I can still be human, still sin, still be me, but such a different me. Redeemed is that ultimate word for such. That kind of redemption cannot be found without you.

“All my life I have been called unworthy. Named by the voice of my shame and regret. But when I hear you whisper; child, lift up your head, I am not done with you yet.”

Oh, this is cool. Part of giving up the fight, allowing your gift of redemption to engulf me, is hearing YOUR voice above the noise of myself and others. All the people who have abandoned me have done it with great relentless noise. That noise even comes from some in the form of deafening quiet.

Giving up this fight has helped me to tune it out, turning that volume down. Getting that useless noise turned down, I could finally hear your sweet tender whisper. In my emergency last week, I easily turned off the noise and listened for you. I did hear your whispers of tender reminders that you were right there with me. You did not abandon me. You gave me permission to hold my head high no matter what has happened in the past.  You had to hold my head up for me through this emergency, but it was done with a security in knowing I belong to you. I hope I never forget that complete feeling that I don’t think I have ever had before.

Propitiation comes to mind. The word “complete,” on steroids, is another way of saying it. God was so completely satisfied with his complete work in Jesus, for us, that it was complete, done, perfect.

“Wipe away every stain. You have set me free. I am not who I used to be, I am REDEEMED.”

I can have all the intellectual knowledge that all of my sins have been wiped away, every stain, all of it. That does not mean that intellectual knowledge has completely filled every space of my being. I have arrived. I think I finally got this one through and through. Think it will stick this time. I strive for perfection and always fall short. Show me the way Lord.

It is DONE. You have already paid the price. Your innocent blood has been shed for the guilty. The world cannot shame me into bleeding any more for my sins and the sins of others placed on to me. Not another drop of my blood is required for payment to live eternally with you. So, this is done.

Lord, save the next person who tries to place that one on me again. You have held my head high for me throughout all of this. With your power, I can finally stand tall and tell satan to stand down!!! I am no longer on the defensive. Instead, I am equipped with my redemption and grace for others. I am also equipped with solid boundaries.

Step 1: Gather

My heart literally had to be broken physically to remove this remaining nonsense. There are so few things of this world that have an ounce of eternal value. As a human and Christian, I am one of eternal value. You gave me that gift. I am sealed and secure in you. Now it’s time to make it every fiber of my being. Nothing of this world can take away anything more from me. Take my life and I am with Jesus, so knock yourself out world, just try it!!!

My thoughts go from one extreme to another at the speed of light. Okay, so the dude who sang the song Redeemed is Big Daddy Weave. Most praise and worship songs I get the most out of just listening to and being with you. This is just one of those artists that, to me, has taken on an image of you. I know that most pictures of “Jesus” look like the “Jesus” we are used to seeing. Long hair, long white robe, skinny, sandals, you know that image.

Well, when I watch Big Daddy Weave I just want to crawl up in his arms and rest in the safety of it all. Lord, my image of you has been contorted with a world-view that is entirely inaccurate. Visually you change in my mind. Just like how the movie “The Shack” portrayed God, Son and Holy Spirit. Nothing like what we are traditionally programed to see. You are everything and you can appear as everything and you can change and be all things at the same time to us. Thank you for appearing to me through Big Daddy Weave. Those are such joy filled moments.

Step 2: Focused Reflection

Dang, you want me to focus!! I can do this.

Show me Holy Spirit. Be still, got it, I can do that.     

Step 3: Journal

The last 24 hours physically have been rough. My heart does not want to cooperate. Then I stop and think and realize that my instructions from the doctors through the emergency made it clear to be still. I did too much yesterday, so what should I realistically expect. I just have to get better at being still. I can work from bed, care for others, love on others while I am in bed. I can easily work from bed. No excuses. I can do this.

Step 4: Revisit

Be still in God, not my power or purpose.

Step 5: Active Reach

Decision:

Be still. Not only in physical action but in thought. Still the mind. Still the spirit. Still the space that I usually allow for anger from abandonment. Just simply let it be by being still.

“He says, ‘Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”~ Psalm 46:10    

Action:

Today’s action is NO action. Be still.

Maribeth Baxter, MBEC (Certified Mind-Body Eating Coach)

Dig Deeper – Grow More

Do your own 21-Day Brain Detox, by Dr. Caroline Leaf, Christian neuroscientist.

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75% to 95% of the illnesses that plague us today are a direct result of our thought life. What we think about affects us physically and emotionally. It’s an epidemic of toxic emotions. The average person has over 30,000 thoughts a day. Through an uncontrolled thought life, we create the conditions for illness; we make … Dr. Caroline Leaf